There are boxes everywhere, cut open or firmly sealed, on every surface. Each one a testament to my unacknowledged shopping addiction. It’s always online shopping. Each item is carefully selected, weighed against other options available. I will click add to cart for each competing item. Click, click, click. Soon there will be five or ten or fifteen items. I will click click click through more pages until I give up and go and look at the five— ten— fifteen items in my virtual cart. Some are easy to eliminate: poor quality or too high pricing. Others I click back and forth and back and forth, to reviews and minutia like release dates. I keep winnowing it down until there is a champion, and more times than not, leave it in the cart for later. Later I will move it to my “saved” list so I can repeat the process with something new. Too many times I do click that final button, the “yes” button. Many times I will cancel the purchase— or try to. Many times I will turn around and return the items right away. I’ll amass a number of items and return them all at once. Too many times I will keep them. Sometimes I will go long stretches without buying anything, but I don't learn, nothing changes. Sometimes it's enough to just add things to the cart, without the final click. But eventually, I will click yes, on something. Anything. Everything. Yes.


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